I’m sort of grumpy from the whole lack of sleep last night… The kittens think it’s fun to run a muck through my tiny apartment the entire night.  I wasn’t sure if they were going to tear the curtains down or jump on my face or bring down my entire basket of panties from the closest… or all of the above.  So I didn’t sleep well last night.  (Hopefully this isn’t some habit they’re building… otherwise they’ll get put in the laundry room on a few nights…)

Anyway.  This is what’s been bothering me:

I talked to the boy recently.  You know, the guy who picked his crazy ex who broke into his apartment over me without giving me a heads up until I was meeting her at his concert…  Yeah, him.  I had talked to him a couple times before this (and after that incident), nothing much though.  Small talk.  But this time… well, I found out that he left his ex yet again.  A while ago.  Meaning not long after he put me through that.

Breaking up sucks, but I would have rather had that than the whole drama of finding out the person you thought you were seeing is dating someone he previously considered getting a restraining order on…  I was hurt.  A lot.  For that.

Anyway.  It’s sort of pointless — it’s been months, but it brought back a lot of the pain from that rejection…  I have no interest in him, and am obviously attracted to some one else right now.  But I don’t like thinking about rejection (and all that comes with it).  I don’t like doubting things (and myself), especially when there doesn’t seem to be a reason to…

…Oh.. also, the fact that it’s my niece’s 4th birthday this weekend, and I won’t be going back home to see her… That sucks.  A lot…  I miss that little girl something fierce.

Last night I got a text message from my brother… I didn’t think much of it.  Timmy generally texts me at random times because he’s bored.  So I didn’t answer.  This morning I got back with him.  He just wanted to let me know that he was in Tennessee.  Um.. Ok… Nice to know… Why?  “I’m getting hitched.”  Ok, crazybrothersaywhat?!

Yep.  My brother and his girlfriend eloped in Tennessee today.  You should also probably know that Timmy got his divorce papers a few weeks ago.  He had been seeparated for a couple years, and dating Steph for a while now… but still.  This was a shock to me.  Given that both of them had already gone through the big wedding ceremony previously, they just wanted this to be a small celebration just for the two of them.  Their kids weren’t even present.

In talking with my mom and grandma, it seems that all of us are generally happy for him.  We all wanted to be sure he really wanted this and wasn’t rushing into it… but well, as long as my Timmers is happy, then I’m happy.  Lil G (my niece) really likes Steph and her kids, so well, I’m looking forward to get to know her.

I assured my mom that I wasn’t going to do anything like that though.  I want the big party and the dress.  Not sure which I want more.  Probably going to go with the big party with all my friends, family, and the person I love.  However, don’t get excited.  I’m not thinking marriage right now.  I’m just enjoying things one day at a time.

So… congrats Timmy & Steph!

That, my friends, is someone who definitely makes my list of all-time favorite people.  And today, he turns 27.

It is my job as a little sister to idolize my older brother… and well, I met that criteria from birth.  I was always trailing behind him, wherever Timmy went, I wanted to go to.  And while his first word was “kitty” — a nice two syllable word — mine was “Tim”.  So much for the typical “momma” and “dada” stuff; maybe it says something about our priorities at that age… Especially given that Tim once tried to stick our grandfather’s cat’s head in his mouth… (This was before I was born, so I’m just going based on the stories I know.)

Just as it was my job to love and adore, and ultimately (at least mildly) annoy my dear older brother… It was his job to watch out for and protect his awkward, well-meaning little sister.  He and his friends (who all became sort of a network of other brothers for me) taught me how to play baseball, football, street hockey, they helped me with my bike and roller blades, and they also teamed up to tease me too… My brother also allowed me to help him practice some of his wrestling moves — mainly all the ones where I was pinned down and completely immobile.

Though we did fight and argue (or as my mom would say, scream.. which I guess I can take the credit for most of it), it was generally only when we were just goofying around having fun that one of us would get hurt.  (Though, well, I went through a biting phase when I was really young…) There are two — though one could argue only one — situations where I actually got hurt a bit more than intended…  Timmy and I were goofying off, and he went in to pretend like he was going to headbutt me (I had a pillow covering my face), and well, I moved the pillow and his forehead met my nose.  The second time was pretty much the same situation, except at a different house, and well, we don’t think I moved the pillow this time… But the thing is, each of us only remember one of the situations.. so this is why maybe it only happened once, and well, given the blow my nose and his head took.. that’s why the memory is fuzzy… But it’s left me with a crack in the bridge of my nose.  His hard head went unscathed until a bmx biking accident about four years ago — resulting in 13 stitches in his head and one fake tooth.

As much as he’s protective of me — all the boys in school knew who’s little sister I was — I was (and still am) pretty protective of my Timmy.  Back in 1996, my brother became very ill.  We took him to a walk-in clinic, who said it was just the flu and to give him tons of liquid, sports drinks, and rest… So Timmy rested, and drank a lot of gatoraide… and got worse.  My mother called our normal physician — Timmy was jaundice and pretty much just a skeleton — and the proceeded to take him to the ER.  We were told that Tim had a blood sugar level over 1500, and should probably be in a coma (if not worse)… My big brother was diagnosed with Diabetes type I.  He’s since managed the condition pretty well.  But I’ll never forget how close I was to loosing my bubby.

While he does continue to do some stupid stuff… I still have so much respect for my brother.  He’s smarter than he’ll give himself credit.  Also… Timmy’s one hell of a father.  I love him and his little girl so much… I would do anything for them.

Happy Birthday Timmy!

I love you, bubby, beyond words.

I definitely wasn’t doing well on Monday night — I completely emptied my stomach contents in a handful of hours and have no interest in eating at Steak-n-Shake for a while.  Anyway.  So Monday I was miserable.  Now, I’m still trying to stabilize my body temperature, I’ve got a mild headache and I’m pretty sure my vertigo is bothering me as well.  I’m not doing terrible, but I don’t know if I’ll be able to partake in New years festivities tonight.

Onto more notable things… Christmas Merriment!

I spent Christmas morning with my mom, as I’ve done for all of my past Christmases.  For the past couple years, it’s just been me and my mom — and the pets.  Seriously, Dexter (our dog) loves Christmas.  As soon as you put his present down, he starts unwrapping it.  Bear just loves the ribbons.

That afternoon we went to my aunt’s (mom’s sister).. did gifts there.. Lil G loves it over there.. our little cousin Lleyton has tons of toys, including a bounce house.
On Friday was gifts and food at my grandparents’ (dad’s folks)… in which we did gifts with my dad and sisters too.  This is sort of becoming a tradition too, since we generally don’t go up to dad’s and they’ve just recently started staying there for Christmas morning.

Anyway… I had a great time with the family, giving my mom a lot of monkeys.. and here’s the list of loot that I came away with:

• Blankets – Craig Thompson
• Paste Magazine subscription
• Panda Ornament
• Padded business card holder
• Shark mints
• 2 $15 iTunes gift cards
• Beatles Monopoly
• sewing kit
• Christmas tree ornament
• penguin ornament
• frog tea pot
• fuzzy socks with grip pads on the bottom
• hat, scarf & glove set
• cash & a check
• Brain age 2 for DS

I’m pretty sure that covers it… I might be forgetting something.

Tuija and Kaija also got gifts this year… a new Omega Paw rolling litter box with mat (okay, so I’m more excited about this gift than they are — if it works, no more scooping).  They also got this “over-5-foot-tall” bright pink kitty tower, which they haven’t really played with much, and another kitty cube.

My highlight of my Christmas would definitely be spending time with my cousins.  My cousin KT got married on the 27th, so all the other cousins were in town.  I finally got to see Shune — my Japanese cousin whom I’ve only previously talked to online.  My younger half-Chinese cousins were there, as well as their Chinese mother who lives pretty close to me.  Saramoira couldn’t come out, which was sad… My cousin Nathan was around too, which I enjoyed.  He’s getting his Ph.D at Juilliard in music comp, so he’s generally too busy to keep in contact.

I brought my Wii home… this allowed my cousins, sisters, dad, and grandmother to play… and can I just say, the best Wii bowler in my family is my grandma.  She destroyed us all.

Pictures on Friday.

My holiday was decent.  It was nice to get away for a bit; exchange Tuis & Kai for the Doodles and Tubs of Fun.  And of course, getting to see my family… the tradtion of me carving the turkey…  and actually getting to relax for a bit too.

My Thanksgiving comprised of a quick stop at my late stepmom’s mother’s family’s — an event I typically avoid.  But apparently I have a pretty decent younger cousin, Charlee, who I’ve never met before.. so I just talked with her for a while.  Then we headed off to my dad’s folks.  My newly married cousins, Matt & Kiley were there, as were Timmy and Lil G.  I really do hope that I can continue to get together with Timmy, Matt and Kiley for the holidays.  When Timmy, Matt and I were younger, we spent a lot of time at Grandma & Grandpa’s…  and so now that we’re all adults (or occasionally pretend to be), it’s been nice getting together every once in a while to catch up and continue joking around.

After our filling thanksgiving lunch… the real adults (minus Grandma) took naps… the children ran around… and us young adults sat and talked for a bit.  … Eventually, I had talked the whole family (minus M&K who had to leave) into getting hot wings for dinner… I placed a record order.  $0.60 boneless wing night.  I ordered: 18 plain, 20 sweet barbeque, 10 asian zing, 8 hot barbeque and 5 medium.  A total of 61 wings.  And now I can say the hottest I’ve had is hot bbq.  It was good, but still wow.  Asain zing is still my first pick probably.

Anyway… Friday, my mom and I braved the traffic and mobs of idiots.  I picked up some new ear buds (my panasonic ones had stopped working in the right bud, causing me to question my hearing for a while)… and I got the new Kanye cd too.  Came home and I rested — watched a lot of Deadliest Catch.

Saturday was supposed to be my IsoIsa’s* birthday party.  Unfortunately, he passed out yet again… so we spent a lot of saturday in the hospital, mainly the ER.  IsoIsa fine.  His blood levels were low… he’s having kidney problems (his kidney function is around 25% or so)… but despite all of this, he’s still doing well.  As with 3 of my 4 grandfathers, I know it’s really only a matter of years.  I’ll be lucky if they see me married (if I ever choose to do that)..  But.  He is doing well and is back home.

After lunch, Timmy and I went back to the mall… made some nice shirt purchases and.. and.. FINALLY found boots I liked… However, that saga is for later.  At the mall, Timmy and I ran into his roommate Carter… and then later into Timmy’s brother** Nick and his girlfriend.  We hung out with them for a while.. eventually Timmy dropped me off at mom’s…  where a few hours later I eventually got bored and decided to head off to Timmy’s house… I hung out there, watching him play Grid… got to hear more stories about how Timmy’s ex, the Razzle Rat, is barely watching their daughter (Lil G) and is still a little immature drama queen.  (Seriously, you think I might just be against her for leaving Timmy.. but nope, RR is seriously immature and all of her “friends” think so too.)

Enough of that though.
I got home safely.  I have boots.  And I got to spend some great time with the family.  Even made a deal with Hannah (the oldest of my younger sisters)… she gets to buy my 1GB blue iPod shuffle for $20 for her christmas gift… and well, this just means I get to go out and buy a new iPod for myself.  (more on that later as well).

*IsoIsa = Grandfather (my mom’s dad)
** Nick is Timmy’s brother-in-law, hence, Timmy’s brother, not necessarily mine… though the kid is great.

Lil G Shake Your Butt!

From Matt & Kiley’s wedding. 11.15.08

Told you my niece was amazing.

1. Lil G
Most adorable niece ever.  Seriously.  She never ceases to amaze me, and is a pretty smart little girl.  I just want to spoil her, more so than she already is.  Plus, she gets bonus points for knowing all of the words to Rhianna’s “Umbrella” — as tired of the songs as you might be, it’s so worth hearing over and over again with this amazing 3 year old singing.

2. My Momma
If you’ve ever wondered where my dorkiness comes from, yeah here’s it is.  All from mom.  She’s perfectly okay with it too.. which is awesome.  She feels the need to let me know whenever she sees a monkey, and is constantly sending me Get Fuzzy comics or lolcats.  And while some moms steal their children’s instruments because of the noise… my mom stole my electric guitar and my electric bass (which I stole from my brother) so she could play them.  Every Sunday she rocks out in her church’s praise band.. and yes, she does jump and play barefoot.  Pretty awesome for a grandma.

3. Timmy!
Despite the typical older brother things (see: punching, headlocks, wrestling, cracked noses), my brother is really important to me.  I mean, yeah.  (see: the wench)  I still look up to him a lot.  And if I’m going to go shopping with anyone, Timmy is among my first choices.  I like his style, and he tends to find good things for me.  I don’t always agree with things he’s doing, or some of his choices… but I love my bubby.  And hopefully within a year’s time we’ll have similar tattoos (cherry blossoms).

4. Dad, Cynthia & the girls
Actually.. I want to say, I am amazingly thankful for Cynthia.  She is a blessing to our family.  Other than Karen, my late stepmom, I can’t think of another woman to join our family and help raise my sisters.  Her humor works really well with dad’s — so that’s been great for him.  She’s well traveled, and sees the importance of a good education and higher education (meaning my sisters might be convinced to go to college even more so). She’s taken on a lot — never been married and now she’s got 4 girls at home, two adult children and a grandchild.  She’s pretty amazing in my eyes.  And as always, I’m thankful for the love and care that my dad gives me.  And I’m growing to appreciate my younger sisters more and more.

5. Family in general
My whole family is awesome — and I’m thankful for all of them… all of the grandparents (5 grandmas and 4 grandpas)… the aunts and uncles… all the cousins… I’ve got a pretty awesome and very supporting family and that’s been amazing.

6. My job
While I could do without the data entry and some of the tediousness.. I am indeed thankful for a full time job with benefits where not only am I paid well, but I’m appreciated.  I’ve got a boss who’s really understanding and actually is concerned about me and my goals outside of the facility.  Not many people are this lucky right out of school.  Plus, having a nice income with few bills.. well… my wardrobe, entertainment, and video game budget has definitely increased.  (I get to play with lasers and liquid nitrogen. bonus.)

7. The amazing group of people I call my friends
Seriously.  I feel pretty lucky.  I don’t even think I could name them all.  There have been a select few who have really been there for me and have seen me at my best and worse, and yet they still love me.  Two in particular I practically see as sisters now: Chrizzle and Mennogirl.  They’re pretty amazing.  And I’ve got my uber spectacular group of GC Kids whom I love and miss.  There’s my work friends (George whom I enjoy our evening walks to the train; and Dani and Meaghan who can only be described as wonderfully zany).  Topping everything off with some really amazing people who I’ve met recently — most of whom I’ve met thanks to Dan and Adam… The potluck group… The awesome folk of the reading band and the Mucca Pazza memebers I’ve been lucky enough to get to know… I’ve really got an amazing group of people in my life right now.  (Who else would put up with velociraptor attacks and nonstop dorky nerdom?)

8. The Kits.
Crazy as they may be… I love Tuija and Kaija.  They are just awesome little wonderpets.  Psycho little wonderpets sometimes… but awesome.  Two kittens are a bit much, but it wouldn’t feel right only having one of them.  Definitely a package deal.  And I’m appreciating how they’re morphing into cats and are enjoying a good cuddle.

9. Buffalo/Hot wings.
you taste so good.  there needs to be more of you in my life.

Mennogirl’s clued me in on some decent blogs before, as has my Megatron.  So I started, recently, reading dooce.  This isn’t a shameless plug for her, but I have found it to be somewhat entertaining to read.  But this could just be a phase (I used to read iCiNG, but now find gala… well, too “look at me”/I wanna be famous, but I still check the site every now and then)…

ANYway.
Recently, dooce wrote about politics, more importantly, advising women voters to really look into some issues before voting.  To consider the greater group of females, pretty much.  And this sort of turned into talking about McCain’s views on abortion, and that a lot of people are calling him anti-woman.

Now, I’m not fond of McCain, but those are my own reasons.  (look at the right: these people win — obama ‘08)  And I’m not one to really vote based soley on one issue, and typically abortion isn’t a key issue with me.  I will admit that in the past I will have said that I probably wouldn’t choose an abortion myself, but didn’t want to make that choice for others.  (I will also admit to actually considering it at one point in my life, but I was never faced with that decision — aka I’ve never been pregnant.)  So, that makes me pro-choice.
One person who left comment on dooce’s post asked a really good question….

When did being “Pro-Choice” turn into being “Pro-Abortion”?

Like I said, I’m not typically “pro-abortion”… I’d like to think, baring any health problems of my own, I’d be willing to take care of any child I brought into this world.  But as also mentioned, there was at least one point in my life when I thought that abortion could be an option — but I didn’t have to make that choice.  But that’s the thing, I have that choice.  I am pro-CHOICE, it doesn’t mean I will choose it.

Anyway…. right now, I’m mildly anti-baby.  Or at least, mildly anti-having-a-baby-myself.  Babies are fine.  As long as I can hand them back to their adult.  At this point in my life, I’m big into the idea of adoption.  There are plenty of kids out there who need families.  But well, that’s years down the road.

Right now… the only baby I’m interested in is an amazing toddler who happens to be my niece.
Talk about damn cute.

Lil G